Letter: Reefer Madness in Ascutney
To the Editor:
It’s good to see the progressive-minded residents of Ascutney rally around a worthy cause. The Magic Mushroom, a locally owned business that has operated in the town for three years, traffics in the evils of tobacco pipes and tattoo equipment, among other deviant pleasures. Luckily, the Mt. Ascutney Prevention Program is able to see through the miasma and understand what these deceitful hucksters are out to pawn: marijuana-smoking devices. That’s right, the hippies and hooligans are coming out of the woodwork now that they’ve got a way to smoke their herb and carve their homemade peace sign, er, gang-symbol tattoos.
But as reefer madness spreads through the town, what about the children? During its past three years of operation, when the store sat a whole half mile closer to the town’s school, active and concerned town members must have been too busy chasing down communists and witches to deal with the rampant rate of marijuana overdose.
Thankfully, with faith and guidance, we live in a state that would never allow its residents to be exposed to the perils of marijuana addiction. Our beloved elected leaders would never allow for dope smokers to be seen as anything but the criminals they are, and preferably locked up, never to see the light of day again.
Our country has seen what the perils of marijuana use can bring: relief from cancer symptoms, addiction to potato chips and the potential to be elected the leader of the free world. I, for one, stand with the residents of Ascutney and have purchased a shiny new torch and pitchfork. I just hope they will join me in ridding my hometown of Windsor of our deplorable dealer of cigarettes, opiates, amphetamines and pseudoephedrine. It’s called Rite Aid, and it must be stopped.
Howard L. Lyon